"Central America" - Mid-West and Great Lakes States
	Day 3:  Monday, October 7, 2002

Are you thinking the city name sounds like something from years ago?  It is!  Waterloo, by Abba, from their Waterloo album.  For those of you that would like to hear the tune -- or even to sing along (alone or with others in a karaoke manner), you can click here for the music and the words.  And now, the day's update...

We rolled out of the hotel a bit late, but after making up the 50 miles yesterday, we felt deserving.  We popped into McDonalds for a bacon and cheese McMuffin breakfast, substituting the orange juice for a Dr. Pepper.  Yum.  Then, after leaving the drive-thru, we got on the road (6:26am) and were on our way.  Not two minutes later, the boy mumbled something about getting screwed at the drive-thru (not the exact term), and showed me a sausage McMuffin.  Which obviously wasn't bacon, and I'm no former FFA club member.  So, being the open-minded fowl that I am, I got to have a sausage muffin breakfast because the snooty twit wouldn't eat it.  Good for me.

We plowed through the balance of Nebraska, stopping in Lincoln around 9:15am.  We were looking for the state capital, but by virtue of an act of stupid, we were instead lured into the Wal-Mart in Lincoln (402-438-4377, managed by Ryan Hoage).  Okay, so we did get a couple of neat things there, but still.  We'll invariably have to go back and stop in Lincoln, since we left without my photo of the capital building.   I asked about why, and he had no reason, except that he was still giggling about the men's underwear (brief style) being on the rack, for sale.  (Why that's funny, dunno... we've seen ladies underwear sold like this for years.) 

So, we're off to Omaha.  We arrive there about 45 minutes after leaving Lincoln, and take a random assortment of photos.  An Omaha Police car, very uneven, but there you go.  The post office.  A calm little park that runs through the downtown area, and then to a small water area described by the sign as a park.  The Omaha Convention Center, still being built.  We also passed the zoo, and had to come back to get a picture of the dome thing that is part of the zoo.  Which part -- dunno.  I'm just here to take the pictures, it's your job to sort 'em all out.

After crossing into Iowa, we stopped for gas and a look-around in Council Bluffs, Iowa.  I wasn't sure if the Glass Front Tavern is an attempt at irony or humor, but either way, it made me smile.  I was impressed by the road surface -- asphalt -- that was covering brick instead of just gravel.  Makes you think this was the old part of town (by the way, it's the old part of town).  I also like the fact that people apparently can live next to one another without six-foot-tall fences between one another.  

And we were back on the road again, now bound for Des Moines, or rather, a southern turn before we got to Des Moines.  Along the way, we passed a turn for Winterset, birthplace of John Wayne.  Neat.  (It was a bit off the path, though, so we didn't venture further into that trail.)  

About 1:15pm, we hit Indianola, which was noteworthy for two events.  The first was Simpson College, which just made we think of the episode where Homer went to college, and Bart asked if it was barber or clown.  (And is it just coincident that there's a Planned Parenthood right across the street?  Probably.)  The other was the National Balloon Museum (their web site).. hot air balloons, if you were unclear.  We were there for about an hour, chatting a bit with Barb, the volunteer staffing the museum today about this and that (and while I shopped for trinkets and such).  There was tons of interesting stuff, but I'll eventually have to give it a separate page.  My favorites were the unique-shaped balloons, like the retail products, Whopper, Statue of Liberty head, corn-on-the-cob.  

The only other item of note from Indianola was my guess of the relationship between the elephant and a car wash -- the elephant is using his trunk to bathe himself, much like washing a car?  If that's not it, this is a complete mystery.  And then we left for Des Moines and our stopping point for the day.

Around 2:45pm, we wandered into Des Moines, with a less than ceremonial arrival -- but at least there was a sign, albeit tiny.  We stopped for a view of the Des Moines skyline (so you can recognize it the next time it opens an episode of COPS), and the Iowa state capital building.  And then back onward.  (There was nothing in Des Moines on our to-see list, you see.)

Once back on the road, we saw this construction vehicle with a sign that just made you want to say, "well, duh!"  We were heading toward Waterloo when a detour sent us on a 40 mile side-trip.  It seems a dotted highway on the map means "proposed" and that it doesn't yet exist.  Dang!  The detour took us through a couple of little towns along the way, worthy of mention (a little mention, they're little towns):

• Iowa Falls - "The Scenic City."  A good place to buy gas and another Pepsi, apparently.  But not for a skating rink (it's out of business).  And the usual water tower and downtown picture.
• Alpington - "Northern Iowa's Best Kept Secret."  Just another day on the main street.  A house with an old Ford for sale (didn't get the number), and the main street... not really a downtown to speak of, and couldn't find the water tower (I'm sure it's here somewhere).

By 5:15pm, we were back on the other end of Highway 20 (which doesn't join with the far end we had to detour through those towns from).  If nothing else, though, a beginning of a closed freeway means you can have a picture taken without fear of dying.

We arrived in Waterloo and checked in around 6:30pm, found our neighbors in 104 are either deaf, dead, or not in the room, as I can hear the TV with greater clarity than I can hear the boy mumble (although this, in a bigger sense, is okay).  We popped out for dinner, and fear not -- yup, Pizza Hut.  The service was mediocre, and since the sign noted that gratuities (why not come right out and just call 'em "tips" or "salary enhancements", you cheap management bastards?), no gratuity was left.  We couldn't even tell you who it would have gone to; one girl seated us, another took our order, a third brought it, and a fourth refilled our sodas.  Too confusing.  

After that mentally exhausting event, we returned to the room, after investigating this sign (turns out it's the name of the museum, not the subject matter of the museum).  The boy amused himself with a ball of lint he'd just discovered (from where, I dare not ask) and a brand-new quarter dollar coin, as I sat here and updated the page, and tried to create a CD using a new burner I'd stumbled across at yet another Wal-Mart.  (The price was quite reasonable, and you never know when you may be out of town and need to make a backup copy of some data or another.)  And then, sleepy eyes... but with our first significant activity having a 10am open time a mere 150 miles or so away, we're sleeping in.  :)

Bonus Material - Better than a DVD, and at no additional charge!

This is now the third day of 16 on this trip.  For those of you who are fortunate enough to be able to continue living normal lives, let me give you a glimpse of what I have had to put up with... you decide if someone could call the SPCA and turn Tubby in for abuse to me.

First, the babysitting matters:

• Someone forgot their toothpaste when they left home.  (Not naming names, but ducks don't have teeth.)  Result:  Trip to Wal-Mart.
• In Rawlins, WY, someone put the thermometer on the car hood to see how cold it was outside.  Seven minutes later, while on the interstate, that same someone realized he never brought it in.  Yup, it's gone.  Result:  Trip to Wal-Mart (but the replacement has an indoor/outdoor probe, so it's much nicer -- and digital.)
• That same person left one of the two gloves (in a "pair" of gloves) at home.  Mr. "I can pack in 10 minutes", hmmph!
• He apparently didn't listen to me to turn around before asking where the K-Mart was in Alliance, Nebraska -- and yes, it was literally right behind him.

Things that I am both disturbed and impressed by, all at once, while Tubby is driving.  Which I guess makes me "disturessed", which isn't a word.

• 15 minutes spent between Elko, Nevada and Wendover, Nevada when he cleaned out the side pocket and center console of the car.
• Reading a map (those big ones, folded out) while driving 90 MPH and not hitting anything
• Managing to steer with his knees when we wants to fold his arms across his chest or stretch his arms.  Or steering with the chin, however briefly.
• Rearranged the keys on his key ring while they were in the ignition and we were barreling along I-80. 
• Being able to navigate the pedals with the left foot as well as the right.
• Being as boring as he is on matters that have absolutely nothing to do with the conversation at hand, our lives, or the trip.  The gathering of random bits of trivia and turning them into some cosmic conspiracy.  All the while claiming not to be paranoid, and just accusing me of letting "them" mislead me on those same matters.

Ever wondered what we talk about?  I don't, but that's because I'm subjected to it every day, for hours at end.  Things like:

• If S.O.S is the distress signal that means "save our ship", where did the term Mayday come from?  And why does it have this name?  
• Bigamy.  What's the big deal, anyway?  When you get right down to it, it's another example of the conservative Christian right-wing and the Church to try and impose their value system on the general population.  When that didn't work, they pressured the legislature to outlaw such practices.  While not personally an advocate for polygamistic relationships, what about them demands that they be inherently illegal throughout the country?
• If we have a leap year because the calendar year is actually 365.25 days, that makes sense; the fourth year we need to schedule that entry day into the mix.  When do they adjust the clock to reflect that the full rotation isn't exactly 24 hours, but instead 23 hours and 56 minutes?  Basic math dictates that we're losing 4 minutes per day, multiplied out to 365 days a year, we're losing 1460 minutes per year to this anomaly, or 24 hours, 24 minutes.  Does that mean the calendar should really be 364 days per year?

Which then means I have to spend time looking up why it is, just to explain it to him in such a way that even a four-year-old in the movie Philadelphia could understand.  So far, what I've come up with, in order:

• Mayday comes from the French word "m'aider", or "come help me".  It first came into use somewhere in the late 1920s specifically for aviators.  SOS was selected by the International Radiotelegraphic Convention at London in 1912 as the uniform distress signal.  The letters (SOS) do not refer to any words but were selected because they are easy to transmit. (...---..., or 3 short, 3 long, 3 short).
• I am so not interested in a discussion as to the application of morality throughout the American penal code.  Let's face it, right or wrong, the United States was founded by a bunch of outwardly purist Christian types who sought to outwardly enforce their particular interpretation of their particular bible or holy book, and make civil law to apply to all people, regardless of race, creed or personal beliefs.  Is that wrong?  I've no opinion on that.  The legislative bodies are elected in this country, so if you think it's wrong, take action to correct it.  Personally, I'm not yet 18, thus I am not permitted to vote by virtue of being covered in feathers.  But then again, I don't abide by such laws anyway.  I'm of the opinion that two (or more, I suppose) persons of majority (18 in most states in this country) who engage in willing, informed and consensual activity,can do as they please; I really don't care what they do, nor am I interested in sitting on a jury gathered to judge their guilt or innocence of a violation of moral turpitude.  But I'm sure I'd want to find them not guilty, and therein lies the rub -- if I was ever called, I'd be dismissed by one or all members of the court for not being impartial and unbiased.  But honestly, how many people truly are impartial and unbiased?  We all carry beliefs, values, and notions that were instilled within us by our parents, peers, and community from an early age.  Can anyone truly be impartial and unbiased, without also being ignorant of the real world and current events?
• Time and Calendars
  • Leap Years.  The length of a solar year is 11 minutes shy of 365.25 days (to be exact, it's 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes).  The leap year takes place every four years to adjust our Gregorian calendar back in synch to the solar calendar.  But what about those 11 minutes?  Yup, that's factored in as well.  Three times every 400 years, the leap year is skipped and we'll run seven years without a leap year before we observe it again. 
  • The Day's Length.  He's mostly right.  A solar day is actually 23 hours, 56 minutes, and 4 seconds.  This is the time it takes the earth to rotate one full revolution on its axis, such that a star observed in the heavens would be in the same place the next day, presuming they are also in  the very same spot.  (The same spot links into sidereal time, or the notion that time will offset by a few minutes as you move within the time zone).  The raw deal is we're 3 minutes and 56 seconds short of a 24 hour day, every day.  And Baldie's right, it does add up.  Very, very slowly.  From there, I told him to go take an astronomy course, and this time, try to do the homework and get better than a C-... that may help his understanding tremendously.