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| 6:14am (CST) |
Alarm went off. Trooped back to where car
was parked and reclaimed it as our own. The bellhop tried to grab
hold of the rest of the luggage. However, I am working with cheapskates.
They didn’t make me hold anything, but I watched with glee as
they struggled with the six-packs of Diet Pepsi and Dr. Pepper on
top of the other crap they brought. |
| 7:01am |
Back to sleep again…oh the joy. |
| 10:55am |
Wakey, wakey. I made the girls get up OOB (nurse slang for Out Of
Bed; it can be handy hanging out with a nurse, you know). Showering
was a must. I gathered my
supplies and hopped in. |
| 12:15pm |
One of the hazards of traveling with females (sometimes I do miss
the Bald One) is the getting ready period. First they have to pick
out the clothes (I’m down with my down), then shower, then blow-dry
the hair, make-up themselves, spray the perfume, talk and talk and
talk. Not that I mind that. I happen to enjoy a good rambler. Finally,
I was tucked safely in the girl’s arms and we headed down to
Canal. We made for the French Market and the flea market down on Decatur. |
| 12:40pm |
Pit stop at Café Du Monde. Two orders of beignets were ordered
along with hot chocolate and OJ. Oh, don’t you worry -- they
shared with me. The second sister didn’t want the powdered sugar
to get all over me, so she designated herself as the
beignet holder. Dai
was kind enough to bring the food and take a picture with me. |
| 1:18pm |
Purchased The
Hottest F$@#&g Sauce from World Famous N’awlins Cajun
Creole Spices, Inc. Boy, try saying that five times fast. I rather
liked the French Market. Even if the anonymous
cashier didn't want to name names (her own, that is). |
| 1:30pm |
The nerd girl found some earrings she liked at the flea market.
She bargained the jewelry down while I posed in front of Shirley.
The woman encouraged me to try on some
rings. My question: where would I place it? Wings, remember? The
first sister ended up forking over $9.80 rather then $11.50. Whoop
dee doo. |
| 2:00pm |
The flea market was so humid and all those people. Mind you I like
people, but I was bumped into and the girls had fixed my feathers
so nicely this morning. I tried to do the haggling thing too but I
wasn’t successful. There was this nice shirt I wanted to buy
“Property of New Orleans City Jail.” The heavily accented
man was asking $15.99. I offered a Lincoln and a Washington to the
guy. He told me to walk around while he thought about it. Read: get
the hell away from me, you ghetto duck. |
| 2:15pm |
Walked away from the flea market and met
Mason.
He loved my SpongeBob backpack. He also thought the pen I gave him
was rather nifty. |
| 2:30pm |
Walked into some piercing shop. All my blood was shuttled to my
internal organs as I contemplated a piercing. Nah, I think I just
observe and not participate. The second sister was considering paying
someone to jab a hole in her belly button. The shaved head, lower
lip pierced, gravelling voiced dude behind the counter. To the nerdy
first sister, “So Miss I-Bring-Nothing-to-the-Table, what do
you want pierced?” She quickly verbalized her status as a wimp
and that she wasn’t looking. All three of us backed out of there
hastily. |
| 3:20pm |
Sat down at the Market Café. Valerie
was kind enough to seat us and provide food in the form of a chicken
po-boy, a muffaletta, and bread pudding. I prepared to be invited
to play with band. It could happen. Benny Hardy and the New Orleans
Knights Jazz Band were playing. Benny refused to take a picture with
me, uttering, “I can’t, I just can’t.” Hah!
I took
one of him anyway. |
| 4:00pm |
We observed Dr. Eric, a street performer, having a large fellow
step on his head and upper back while the
good doctor lay on broken glass. Not my cup of tea. We headed over
to the St. Louis Cathedral and were sacrilegious. Don’t I look
damn good near this glass window of Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ?
We were offered some ashes to smear over our forehead and we politely
declined. |
| 5:05pm |
Back to Hotel Monaco to plan our adventures this eve. Definitely
a vampire tour. Yippee! |
| 7:45pm |
Got butts in gear and headed for St. Louis
Cathedral where the vampire tour would start. Kind of a naughty place
to start things off, especially since this is Ash Wednesday. Arrived
and received “blessed” cheap white Mardi
Gras beads and a sticker. We still had time to kill so once again
is was beignets at Café Du Monde. |
| 8:35pm |
The tour began a little late and we were divided into two groups.
We opted for Brett
Thomas, a licensed New Orleans city guide and a soon-to-be-daddy.
Congrats to you, buddy. We started off in Pirates’ Alley and
proceeded to God knows where. The French Quarter can be disorienting
at night. We spoke to Drew and Rich along our tour. They even consented
to take a photograph with
me and the chicks while we were at the Whirling
Dervish (no web site for them, but here
is a brief bit about 'em). Drew’s on the right; Rich on the
left. Yeah, the bar didn’t even card me. We continued our tour.
It was the coolest dang thing. We saw a
nunnery that probably houses vampires in the attic. We also stood
in the place where two female interns were found nude and drained
of 80% of their blood. Even valiant I was chilled to the bone |
| 11:00pm |
The tour halted where it started, Pirates’ Alley. I purchased
the Haunted History Tour (web
site) video, Journey Into Darkness… The Trilogy. A good
pal, albeit human, doesn’t do the reading thing. Thought that
a video would be the way to go. Also bought the book “Journey
Into Darkness… Ghost and Vampires of New Orleans.” The
author signed it with a “Fangs a lot.” How cute |
| 11:15pm |
Met Kevin, a fanged human. Originally from Boston, the guy decided
he liked humidity more than snow. He led us to Bourbon Street and
explained which drinks are best for the pursuit of drunkenness. Allegedly,
absinthe is a good one as well as straight chartreuse. We thanked
him and moved down Bourbon on our own power |
| 11:55pm |
Back at the hotel. The girls thought it humorous to put the hotel’s
robe on me and pretend I was a drag
queen duck. I put up with their behavior for a short time because
they’re so cute. To sleep now. |
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